3 essential steps to confidently connect in business and life

As a business owner or professional there is no doubt, that we benefit from meeting others and expanding our connections. Yet it can be a challenge to start a conversation with a stranger at a business event for the first few times. This is one of the primary reasons many people can find networking an uncomfortable experience. Their ability to make confident conversation has a lot to do with it.

I know from experience that networking is a learned skill, just like learning to climb a fence or ride a bike as a child, we need to learn strategies to create and have conversations that provide opportunities for relationships to develop. These three tips are a good start to improving your networking results and developing the connections and confidence you need.

1. Practice Having Conversations

Whenever we learn anything new, we need to take some risks. We need to recognise that everything new is usually hard before it becomes easy. We need to be prepared to step out of our comfort zone and practice.

As the saying goes “Practice makes perfect”. We get better and more confident over time and the ability to confidently connect is the same.

To connect with confidence, good communication skills are a must. Words, tone, delivery, body language and of course context and setting play a big part. Conflict arises when these are not managed well. No matter what the setting, how you communicate influences the outcome.

Role-playing conversations helps boost your confidence making it easier to adjust to new circumstances and environments.  At YTM Connect with Confidence events, our participants have the opportunity, in a safe and friendly environment to answer impromptu questions which allow you to provide insight into you and your business.  The questions give you the   chance to refine, rehearse, practice and become more comfortable and confident then talking with others about your business.

2. Understand the Five Styles of Communication

To be able to connect you need to understand the five typical styles of communication and spend some time identifying your style and how it may effect others.  I have highlighted the key points defined by the Australian Psychological Society. I recommend you read the article in its entirety.

Assertive communication style

· Associated with high self-esteem and the confidence to communicate without playing games or manipulation.

· Delivered usually with a medium pitch, speed, and volume.

· Good eye contact, and relaxed, open posture is displayed. No fidgeting.

The most effective communication style.

Aggressive communication style

· Focus on winning even if at the other person’s expense.

· The behaviour suggests they have more rights than others.

· Not a healthy way to communicate.

The Passive-Aggressive Communication Style

· The behaviour appears to be passive, but is actually  an indirect act of anger.

· Subtle aggression and sarcasm is displayed, and the person is not usually reliable.

· Inconsistent - pleasant to your face but not behind your back.

The Submissive Communication Style

· People-pleasing and conflict avoidance.

· Yields to preferences of others

· Uses a soft volume and can fidget

And not always apparent to others what they want.

The Manipulative Communication Style

· Driven by influencing and controlling others for their own gain.

· Elicits sympathy and an obligation to help from others.

· Can display patronising, ingratiating, envious behaviour, and often communicates in a high-pitched voice.

3. Ask the right Questions

When you ask the right questions , conversations will start to  flow. If you listen carefully to the responses a deeper and more meaningful conversation evolves. This helps you build confidence, and in time you will find it easier to develop a relationship and seek out opportunities, generate leads and find others to collaborate and joint venture with.

We remember a particular attendee at an event some years ago, arriving at one of our events.  Reluctantly, she entered the room, unsure of what to expect. My husband welcomed her warmly and introduced her to a few of the other attendees. Nervously she thrust herself into conversation, even though out of her comfort zone.

She shared that her business was in start-up phase and that networking was a new thing and she was nervous. Encouraged by the warm welcome and the fun and effective structure, she settled into the evening’s conversation and enjoyed the insight from our guest presenter. We exchanged experiences and knowledge. In return, she opened our eyes to situations foreign to our own. She asked questions to seek feedback on her business model and appeared to enjoy the event.

A few days later, we received a hand written thank you note. Followed a day or so later by a LinkedIn message that read: “Since you introduced me to networking, a whole new world has opened up. I am starting to plan some of my own training seminars as a result.”

By taking small steps and reaching out to others, we build our confidence. This can make all the difference, personally and professionally.

What tips can you share on how you developed your confidence? We invite you to comment below.

Refine, practice and talk more confidently about your business with others.

Would you like to improve your ability to engage in conversations? Making conversation is a life skill and when you can talk more confidently with new connections, your world will expand, personally and professionally.

Consider coming along to a YTM Business Connect event and practice articulating your value, asking qualifying questions and talking business with likeminded others .

Alternatively, we offer 1:1 or small group workshops to improve techniques, give you strategies and role play scenarios using specially designed tools and games that help conversations flow naturally and connect you with confidence.

Hello, we are the team behind YTM- Kerryn and Leigh Powell.

We look forward to connecting with you. and know that when you learn how to better connect through purposeful conversations you will see a positive impact on your business.

Your business will benefit from your increased confidence, improved conversational skills, access to support, focus on business strategy and the opportunity to share knowledge and experience with like minded business owners and professionals. See for yourself; transactions flow from transformation and relationships are the key! If you would like to receive updates on our events, connect with us via our LinkedIn Company page